Harassment and stalking – 11-15

What is the difference between harassment and stalking?

Harassment is when someone behaves in a way that makes you feel threatened, frightened, embarrassed or scared. This can include someone spreading rumours about you or always making nasty comments.

Stalking is when someone follows you or always tries to talk to you or be around you when you don’t want them to be. This can include always calling; emailing; sending letters; or waiting where they know you’re going to be.

It is important to know that both stalking and harassment are illegal.

Why is somebody targeting me?

You may know the person who is stalking or harassing you, or they may be a mystery person who you have never met.

There are many different reasons which may cause someone to try to worry or annoy another person. These could include:

  • loneliness;
  • revenge; or
  • wanting to be in control.

They may even wrongly believe that the person they are bothering is really in love with them and that sooner or later, they go out with them.

Whatever is happening, it is important to know that it is not your fault.
Even if you know or once knew the person involved, that does not mean it is acceptable. It is wrong and can be very scary.

How should I feel if I am being harassed or stalked?

Stalking and harassment can have a huge impact on your life. It can make you change the way you live, may stop seeing your friends, lead to you changing your phone number or make you decide to stay at home more.

These situations can leave you feeling lonely, scared, frightened or on edge all the time.

If you feel any of these things, it is perfectly normal and you’re not alone. Lots of people feel the same away, and there are people who can help. This is illegal and you should not have to put up with it.

What can I do if I’m being harassed or stalked?

Harassment is a criminal offence. It is important to tell people it is happening, as you need to make sure you stay safe and people know you’re worried about something.

You may find it difficult to tell other people about what is happening – you might be worried about what they will say or if they will believe you.

  • Tell an adult you trust. This could include a teacher, a family member, youth worker, social worker or support worker. An adult will help you make a plan to make sure you stay safe;
  • talk to Voice. We’re here to help on anything, big or small.
  • contact the police. Stalking and harassment are against the law, so if you decide to report this, don’t be scared – you will be taken seriously. If you’re worried you’re in immediate danger, call 999. If not, talk to someone on 101.

As well as speaking to someone, make sure you:

  • gather as much evidence as possible of what has been happening to you. This might include copies of emails, text messages and unwanted gifts;
  • keep a log of all the incidents that have occurred. Write down what has happened soon after each event including times and dates. This is important because it shows police, friends or family exactly how the person’s behaviour has impacted on your life;
  • tell the person – clearly and calmly, just once, that you don’t want a relationship with them and want them to go away. Make sure you don’t communicate with them and never answer or return phone calls.

If things carry on, the courts can order the person to stop harassing or stalking you.

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